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Self control and an 80lb suck

June 22, 2018


Howdi! So last week I finally had my appointment to see allergy specialist. I have been waiting for this apointment for over a year, not to mention the 6 years prior and 3 family doctors before someone would take me seriously and send me. Its been a long, itchy 6 years. The straw that finally snapped was last summer when I went to see my new family doctor looking like a giant snot ball basket case. He gave me a grocery list of allergy meds, which I am ironically allergic to half of them (great right lollll), and the hope that I would get to see an allergy specialist. After  a few months of waiting, I got the call that my appointment was almost a year after my doctor had sent the referral. In Canada health care is "free" and frankly you get what you pay for! I was excited though! This is what I had been waiting for for so long and I would finally get the answers I needed. Unfortunately this doctor was a hike and a half away in a different city and had zero idea where I was going. It only took 2 detors, a few failed directions, and a panic attack but I arrived!!!! Sign number one this wasn't going to end well; no cell reception in the waiting room. For the love of! Turning off data didn't work either. I am starting to think I may have a problem. Sign number two; this was not a specialist office but a medical center that had family doctors as well. Hmm... weird but okay. I wait there for what feels like an eternity when I was finally called in. The lady who brought me into the office gave me a mountain of paper work and then asked if I had ever had the scratch test done before. Wait what? Are we just rushing into this???? I thought this was a consult, dammnit! I fill it out and warn the sitter I am going to be a little later than expected. You know on the two calls I have had from this place you would think I would get a heads up. Well that was sign number 3. She comes back in with her little tray of allergens, oye boy, and starts to explain the process. You know there is a few things they should mention before starting such as "I am going to draw all over your arms, not one but both, along with oh by the way one of them everyone reacts to, oh and you can't scratch annnnnnnything." I find out about this "one everyone reacts to" as its swelling up like crazy and I turned white starring at it. You know when  mosquito bites you and you accidently scratch it once and suddenly you feel the worst itchy burn ever? Yep, so that feeling was litterally everywhere. I reacted to pretty much every single thing she put on me. Big bumps, small bumps, some as big as the space she drew for each. I could have sold my soul to scratch at that point. Oh and best part ever.... sit still without touching either forearm for 15 mintes. SURE!!! NOT A PROBLEM, I'll just go fuck myself. The biggest reaction was ragweed, it was massive. Not only massive it took 3 days for the swelling to go away. The doctor finally came in and was basically like so you are highly allergic to these items, and semi allergic to these and barely to these. Um... ya I can tell, what are my options. His response is that for the ragweed and only the ragweed I could use an injection or pills to build up a tolerance but they are expensive or over the counter medications. Awesome, go on.... oh wait you are done?!?!? Boy I wish I could get paid what he does just to say that. He also said I can avoid the allergens, (reallllllly I never thought of that!!!!!!) and to stay inside and use air conditioning (but my arm is saying I am also allergic to dust lollll also I got two kids how am I supposed to keep them inside all summer!) When I was leaving it was a okay have a great day and call the office if you want to do more testing.... thanks, so I am just supposed to leave all of these allergen fluids on my arms and all these pen marks!?!?!? Now I am sure he went to medical school and got some fancy degree but is that really my only options, what a waste of time and I am no further ahead then I was 6 years ago! Life I guess. One of the things I am allergic to which I already knew, was cats and dogs. Good thing I own a dog and three cats lolllllll. But boy I tell you when I finally went to pick up my youngest, I grabbed that soap and scrubbed my itch arms like a two dolla hooker with fleas on pay day. Dear Lord that felt amazing. I am sitting there thinking these bumps should be gone soon... wrong. Some of them took dayyyyyyys. I tried to carry on the rest of my day when our 80lb suck decided to be a brat and wouldn't stop barking outside. So I went to call her to come inside, That didn't work. I tried pulling her leash... that didn't work. She decided to just lay down, right there. ERRRRRR! So away I went and picked her up and carried her like a baby inside. As it turns out I am also allergic to grass (if anyone owns a bubble I would love to borrow it), and she had been rolling around in it. I brought her inside and my bumps now had hives on my bumps. Kinda like a troll creature with layors and layors of creepy bumps. Thanks dog lol!!! Been a week and I can finally say I am bump free, however I just had to carry her again and well... you get the picture lol!!!!


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